Having passed a lot of Japanese green pheasants along the Tama River in the past couple of weeks, I decided to burden myself with a cumbersome camera.
Of course, I got almost no sight of the avian creatures!
That’s not quite true: I saw plenty of pheasants, and heard even more, but wasn’t close enough in most cases to get a good shot.
![](https://kangaeroo.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/DSC_5471.jpg)
It was bleak and overcast when I left home, and I noticed scattered rain.
My pedals (I think) are giving me trouble, too.
With my inability to find a new job, it’s adding to my constant stream of worries.
I’m sure that those concerns will never disappear.
If I don’t have something to worry about, I worry.
I’m so full of fear and bereft of hope, but need to keep going on.
Things brightened toward the end of the ride.
Once again I continued to be blessed by the view of the yaezakura along the Hodokubo River.
They won’t last much longer than this week.
![](https://kangaeroo.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/04/DSC_5455-1.jpg)
Forecast rain seemed likely to arrive while on the ride, but now, a couple of hours later, the skies are blue and it looks like a glorious day ahead.
Why do I feel so rotten? Why does it never change? Where is the way out? Is there one?
I’m full of nastiness and unleashed invective when given a chance this morning. I have to speak at a meeting tonight and share my experience with people I can’t rely on. I wonder whether that has much to do with why I feel so rotten?